Send A Card To A Friend Day/Ballet Day/Run For Your Life Day/Sports Day/Bird Festival (California)/Flower Show (Georgia)
2007-02-07 @ 8:44 p.m.

Today was one of those rare days when I woke up feeling truly rested. Guess the afternoon nap yesterday did pay off after all. Have been trying to write lately, but it all just reads like so much drivel. Usually, that wouldn't bother me so much because I'd just want to get something down, but for now, at least, it bothers me. Part of it's to do with not wanting to settle for less, since I know I'm capable of producing good writing. Heck, that's why I dared to apply to the Warwick course. Part of it stems from this feeling that my writing and my life reflect each other, and the picture's boring. Let me put it this way: Materially, I've everything I need, and then some. I've always striven to get the best, and if I couldn't get that, it was second-best or nothing at all. Even when choosing Arts over Medicine in JC, the unspoken rule I laid down for myself was that only a scholarship could possibly justify the choice to those who knew me. I always felt like I needed to live up to what the world expected of me, so I did, and I turned out okay, if I may say so. I'm just saying that it's a rather boring life. What I want is change. I'll get plenty of that once I get abroad, but till then, what's there to do? Everything exists for now within the framework of NS, which is really more like gunning to ORD without incident...